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10 reasons dads are glad we aren’t moms

With Mother’s Day right around the corner, the media will be extolling the virtues of motherhood. And while there are countless reasons we should be grateful for our moms, there are also a few reasons we dads are glad we’re not you.

10

You’re the boss. We know you’re the boss. The kids know you’re the boss. We don’t want to be the boss. Being the boss is hard.

9

Those “pregnancy” and “childbirth” things you talk about sound a little uncomfortable.

8

Traditionally, when daughters get married, we get to walk down the aisle and give away brides. Moms get escorted to the front of the church by an usher in a rented tux.

7

You actually eat the burnt toast and sugar cereal the kids bring you for your Mother’s Day breakfast in bed.

6

Nobody thinks it’s weird when dads tie a bath towel around our necks and pretend to be superheroes with the kids.

5

You actually notice when the house needs to be cleaned. (And, let’s face it — you do just a tiny bit more of the housecleaning than us. Just a tiny bit more.)

4

The world expects moms to be exceptional. That same world wants to give medals to dads who are even slightly above average.

3

Hollywood has never made a movie called “Daddy Dearest.”

2

Three words: “Ask your mother.”

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We can’t think of a better person for the job than you.

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